Don’t be overly fixated on the end result of any process—whether that process be losing weight, starting a business, or seeking a romantic partner—because if you do, like a mirage, the closer you think you’re getting to the end-result, the farther it will move away from you. If, however, you stay focused and committed to the process, the end-result will take care of itself.

The change you seek is not a destination—it’s an evolution of yourself
You might not know it yet, but the value of change is not the end result, it’s how the process changes you as a person. The person you become through the process is far more important than just achieving any goal. The character you develop, the courage you gain, the wisdom you discover, and the faith that’s manifested in you during the process is where the real value lies.

One day, you’ll look into a mirror and see a different person looking back. You’ll see that you’ve changed. In fact, only this “changed” you could hold on to the end-result products of your process anyway. One day, you’ll realize that the end results you sought were but bonuses—wrapping paper on the gift. The person you become through the process is the true gift.

Do you get it now? It is you who needs to change. What you need most is not just weight loss, money, a big home, or a dream mate—those are the BONUSES of you changing. Have you ever wondered why self-made millionaires and billionaires can lose all their assets, but, given about six to eighteen months, they have it all back? They often recover because their wealth was but a bonus of having internalized the entrepreneurial hustle and spirit. They fell in love with the process—the grind, so to speak—a long time ago, and the process so shaped who they are as people that making money is just a side effect.

Find your process and fall in love with it
Ask yourself: What is the process that yields the results I seek? And once you figure out that process, focus less on the results and more on working through the process itself. Working through the process means figuring out what the process requires of you.

Any process that can produce results worth having will inevitably require at least two things:

  1. That you take some important actions that you may not want to take but are critical for your success, and
  2. That you overcome some obstacles that you may not want to face.

There is no magic to getting what you want. It’s all about being willing to do the above. By taking the important actions that you wouldn’t otherwise take, and having the courage to face obstacles that you otherwise wouldn’t face, is the start of how the process changes you.

Now to take engaging with your process to the next level requires you to do something few are willing to do. You must learn to like, enjoy, and/or, yes, even love to do what the process requires. Learning to love pursuing the process is what many refer to as “loving the grind.”

In the simplest terms, loving the grind is all about learning to enjoy overcoming the obstacles that get in your way. It’s about enjoying the “moves” of innovating to get yourself through, around, over, or under your obstacles. It’s about running towards that which you don’t want to do but have accepted is critical for your success.

No love for the process, no sustaining power to reach the end
Truth be told, if you don’t learn to at least enjoy doing and meeting the requirements of your process, you will eventually quit your process. Nobody does anything voluntarily for long that they cannot find some joy in doing.

But don’t worry, it won’t be necessary for you to intentionally grind-out your process for the rest of your life. That’s not your job; your job is to intentionally work your process long enough until it becomes a habit, and at that point your grind will be on autopilot!